Chemical Gods

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These pharmaceutical Gods,

As they are to some,

Have brought me nothing but

Chemical Bullying

And Polluted Strife.

 

There have been short moments of peace

Within the madness of chemical uproar that

These small pills

Have brought

Upon my

Sensitive,

But kick ass,

System.

 

There were those two weeks,

Or maybe just one,

Where I suddenly saw

My life might go on.

This small daily drop of pollutants

Combined together

To give me

The glimmer of hope

That this time in my life

Was/is a time,

Not

“The rest of my life…”

 

But was this really worth it

For just those seven days

Of wide eyed looking

At my path lying ahead

Rather than the current path I dread?

In a weird old way,

It was.

I’m not sure my bod

Would respond that way,

If you asked it direct.

But my heart says

Yes it was:

In a fucked up way it was.

 

My body

Has been through the ringer,

And continues to

As these drugs have festered

And stewed

In their final days.

My body

And my mind

Have been split down the middle

With the taking of these gross polluted things.

But the one ground their feet

Do meet on,

Is the one that says:

FUCK YOU.

 

To the chemicals,

Together they both scream:

We don’t need you.

We don’t agree with you.

And we certainly don’t want you.

So finally,

I am listening.

I’m taking you both for real

And the last month I have been

On the train

To No-Chemical-Ville.

 

Tomorrow is the day

I finally hit it.

No. More. Popping. Pills.

There’s the nugget of fear

That lies unconditionally here,

Of the road ahead

And the unknown state I dread.

But that will be here

Whatever path I choose to take.

And,

Anything will be better

Than this

Chemical Hell

That has been.

 

As of tomorrow

I am living in

Chemical Freedom.

As of today

My last pill was popped,

The packet thrown away,

And my own baseline

Eagerly awaits

To be

Get to known again.

And bizarrely enough,

I’m excited.

photo 2-32

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2 thoughts on “Chemical Gods

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