“The more I fall apart, the more together I feel.”
Falling apart used to terrify me. The thought of it would bring me out in hives, imagining the worst. Imagining a life ruled by the falling apart and never knowing anything else. I can safely say that, as much as it still terrifies me and I still imagine the worst, I now let the Falling Apart happen and I trust it whilst it does. Or at least I trust it in the aftermath. I still put up a good fight, obv. Just not a patch on what I used to. I now ‘run’ from the falling apart for about a minute before I realise it just needs to happen. I used to run for like… 24 whole years.
I never thought I’d say it and it makes me cringe to see I am, but falling apart is actually kinda beautiful. But it’s still a motherf***er. Just a beautiful motherf***er.