About

I’m a writer and cartoonist. I’m a nature addict and a napping enthusiast. I’m a lot of other things too, and this blog is me telling my story, so let’s start with the deets:

Aged 3 my ma and my role, switched. I was titled with the responsibility of saving my her diabetes riddled life, every few days for the coming years.
At 10 this role and relationship was beautifully fucked up.
At 15 the fists at home were being thrown at an all time high.
At 16 ma first started her suicide attempts. These too continued on for the coming years.
At 17 my dabble with anorexia and bulimia began.
At 18 it was in full swing.

At 19 my ma developed psychosis.
At 21 I overate.
At 22 I developed Chronic Fatigue.
At 23 I walked in on my ma attempting to hang herself.
At 23 I was raped.
At 24 I was hit by my boss.
For the summer months of 24 I hit severe depression.
For the winter months I began to develop PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder).
For a couple more of these winter months, I had my first (and LAST) stint of physical self harming.
In the spring of 24 – a year and a half ago – I overdosed.

This event that was intended to bring my life to an end, actually kick started it in more ways than I could imagine. It left me face first in haunting memories, knee deep in grief, and swimming in a pain that is relentless, and seemingly never ending. But the joy, clarity, and sense of connection with myself and the world, that follows these crumbling states, is worth every tear or frown, or yell.

At 26, this blog is my story. It’s my journey of healing and my journey of discovering me. The me beneath, and amongst – and out the other side of – all that crazy shit you read above. It tells tale of my current days, my journey of stepping into my kick ass power, of embracing and releasing my motherfucking anger, of my heartbreak, my inspiration, my food, my grief, my connection with nature and the outside world, and my photographs and cartoons that tell their own stories too.

My life has always danced with total terror and with total beauty. I have been blessed with uncountable incredible experiences, places explored, opportunities offered and adventures galore. Going from someone who used to just tell about the beauty, and joy, I left the darkness and pain stuffed in a box for way too long. Life, for me now, is about sharing it all. My box has already been opened, and as the contents continue to spill to the floor, I want to share them with you all. I hope to reassure others they are not alone, to offer a place for connection, and to inspire. Because whatever shit goes down, out you can come – surviving and thriving. And, it’s a place for me to continue to heal.

Talking and sharing and knowing you are not alone, are – in my eyes – some of the most important things in life, so this is what this blog aims to do. My dream is to share my story with the world and, as I heal, this place feels the best place to start.

All my sunshine.

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94 thoughts on “About

  1. Thank you so much for following my blog. I really hope some of the therapies will help you.
    “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, kjnown loss and have found ther way out of the depths”.- Elizabeth Kubler Ros

    • Thanks so much for your comment. That’s one of my all time favourite quotes. And I am always so touched when I read it, so thank you. There’s a little something in the last post I wrote, ‘do anything’, for you. Looking forward to reading your soul filled words ☀

    • No words can describe how touched and appreciative and humbled I am of your kind words. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. To know you are reading means so much. I am glad we have found each other on this path of healing and thing called life. I’m looking forward to reading all you have to say.
      Thank you some more : )
      Sunshine xo

    • Thank you so much. I am touched and humbled and appreciate your words. I really believe in having fun, and smiling amongst that, as a tool to get through the tough stuff life can land on your plate. Thank you again. Big love to you. x

  2. Hi there!

    Each person has a unique story to tell, a beautiful journey of sadness, joy, achievements n difficult times..
    Every story humbles us down to feel the love in our life , to be grateful for what we have..

    Self love – heals n makes us whole, gives us the strength to not just love ourselves but flow with love n pass it on..
    All the best for your journey & I salute you gal, for your courage to live life in all its beauty 🙂

    Loads of sunshine 🙂
    Cheers

    Shraddha (= Faith in Sanskrit)

    PS: Thanks for the follow, cuz Im glad I found you here 🙂

    • I don’t even know where to start…Your words brought tears to my eyes and left me speechless. Thank you so much dear. I am inspired to read your words about self love. I have only just begun to see the importance of this. It’s almost like I hit a point where there was no choice – I had to begin stepping down the self love path to survive this road. So thank you, to read that reminded me of the crucial element that loving ourself plays.
      Beautiful name too. Unfortunately this blog needs to be anonymous, but my name means peace in swahili, so the fact yours means faith, made me smile!
      So much love & sunshine to you on your healing and inspiring journey xox

  3. Hi Peace!!

    I hope u don’t mind me calling u that 🙂 I believe our name has a huge impact on our life. My name has , on my life n so thought its gr8 if I could call u ‘Peace’

    I believe, all things in our life happen cuz they turn us into what we are – Strong & beautiful..
    I remember, reading an interview of Anita Moorjani, of her near death experience, in which she said,

    “Time seems to have a completely different meaning on [the other] side. What I felt was that all possibilities exist simultaneously – it just depends which one you choose. Sort of like being in an elevator, where all the floors of a building exist, but you can choose which floor to get off on. So if all the future possibilities exist for me to choose from, then I assume all the past scenarios exist too. So depending which future possibility I choose, that will also determine which past automatically comes with it (I chose life, so it affected the past, choosing the appropriate test result for the organ function)”

    So what I took from this was, if I choose a different n beautiful, stronger me- I have to choose all those events (some painful) that lead to me becoming stronger..
    Our past is what makes us..Its something that I always thank myself for inspite of it not being something I’d choose, if I really had a choice..
    But it surely is responsible for what I am – a more beautiful n strong human 🙂

    The link to interview of this healer- Anita Moorjani is here in case u seem to take a look.. I loved how her near death experience cured her of her terminal illness n now she heals others..

    http://bioenergyandcancer.blogspot.in/2011/09/anita-moorjani-quotes-for-energy.html

    and another song that I would love to share with u :

    This song is a beautiful track helped me look at life, as lessons learned 🙂

    Cheers
    Faith

    PS- Sorry if I shared too much stuff here that kinda looks boring.. just thought of sharing 🙂

  4. I recognize so much in your life-story.
    I hope you find all the happiness that life can give you
    and I wish you all the best. The little I’ve seen from you, I already know you are a beautiful woman!

    X

    • Thank you so much my dear. That means so much to read that and know you feel that from our contact. I’m touched. Sorry to hear you recognise a lot from my story, but I hope that it can bring you understanding too. And a knowing that there are lots of people out there with things to share that help you know it’s okay…and it will be okay. I also want to add in the little snippet of history above, all the amazing things that have happened in my life. So I will do that soon because it is so important to share these things too. Big love to you peach. X

  5. I’m so pleased you stopped by my blog so I could find you here. Wow – I am so touched by your blog, I guess you could say you had me at your Rumi quote! 🙂 I look forward to getting to know you more. 🙂 Here’s to the road less traveled…

    • Thank you so much, I am touched by your words. And I am loving your blog. Glad to have found you on here. Speaking of the road less travelled – have you read that book? It’s a good one : ) Big love X

      • Me too, so grateful to have found your blog. Thank you kindly for checking mine out, sometimes I feel I don’t have much to share or say, but I suppose that’s normal…LOL…whatever in the heck normal is! 🙂 I’ve not read the book “The Road Less Traveled”, I started it years ago and never got far.

        Right now I’m reading “Meant to Be” by Walter Anderson. It’s a beautiful story, one of those unexpected treasures that helped replace something inside I didn’t know was missing.

        Blessings, Love & Peace,
        RH

  6. Oh, I am so very sorry to read all you’ve been through. I had not read your About Me until now, and had no idea. On the other hand, you are wise beyond your years and are only going to grow stronger to overcome your past. I can relate to you even more now, since there are a few events on your timeline that hit home for me as well. The more I learn about you, hear from you, and read from you, the more I realize what a truly strong and special person you are. Thinking of you:)

    • Sorry to only just be replying to this love. Your words here mean the world and are so touching and heartwarming – thank you. I am so glad that we found each other on here, and always am inspired by what I read on your blog. I hope any words on here can bring reassurance for the things you connect with. Thank you again for all your support, always helps a lot. Tonnes of love. X

      • I wish I had more time to read to sit and enjoy everything that you and so many others are sharing about your journeys… Just know that I think of you and your courage often! Talk soon! :)))

      • Ah, thank you love. That’s so touching to know. And know that it is the same my end too – I often think of you and your story and the lovely words of support you have said to me along the way. Always here too if you want to email – metaphoricalmarathons (at) gmail . com. Hope life’s shining and alls okay. Big love X

    • Oh wow. This blogging world is just getting more and more amazing. Thank you so so much! What a touching thing to wake up to – you’ve totally made my day And on a day I needed it the most. Have left you some more words of gratitude on your post. Your blog is like a breath of fresh air my dear x x

  7. This is overdue. I want to thank you for following my blog. May you be led to all that you need to bring about balance and wholeness. Healing takes a lot of courage. You are a brave soul. And yes, please stay in touch. Much blessings, Peace & Joy, Love & Light! ♥♥♥Nadine Marie♥♥♥

  8. Wow. I am so deeply touched by this blog. By your life, your courage and your way with words and being. Thank you for sharing! All my love. X

    XX

  9. Hey darling, I couldn’t find your email adress. Check my last post about bloggers4kindness project, I humbly aks you to join me (it’s like i have had this whisper from univers/god whatever to ask you to join….i swear…haha and I never swear)? I truly believe you can make such a huge difference. Let me know. weirdo mesage, I know. haha. hugs 🙂

  10. Summerteifi,
    Sweetheart, I have just revisited your About page. I had visited it earlier on, and somehow never connected it to you and your blog. You are so young! I wish you so much love and sweetness in your life, to balance out the trauma of your younger years. Sounds like a good long rest would work wonders too. Maybe a shoulder to cry on, and listening ears and plenty of kind faces and gentle souls. Lots of love to you through the end of this year, and on throughout all of the following ones. May you live long and free.
    Jessie.

  11. Hi there summerteifi,
    I’ve sent a quick email, and just letting you know there is a listening ear here. Hope you are okay today. I’ll be checking in on my emails throughout the rest of the day. Lots of love to you.
    Jessie.

  12. Wowzahs! You just sifted through all that hell so casually. Kudos. I know how tough it is to do that.

    I just started a blog called a manic world. It’s based on depression. I’m running the blog but I don’t consider it mine, it is its own entity, like depression. If you’d want to write for us, would love to have you on board. Your honest, dark, and seem to have flickers of light shining through. Contact info is at the site, http://www.amanicworld.com or just click my gravatar.

  13. Hi MM, Thanks for visiting Wanderlust. I’ve listed your blog on the ‘Healing through Storytelling Directory’ under the categories you suggested. I hadn’t had a category for suicide, but decided it was important to include that, too, so it’s up there now.

    Your journey is quiet stunning and so very sad. How brave of you to tell your story openly the way that you have. You clearly have a strong, survivalist spirit. I believe that expression leads to healing, both for ourselves as the narrators of our own stories, and for those who read and find solace in shared experience. I wish you strength and healing and much love.

    • What a beautiful comment thank you. And thank you for mentioning MM on Wanderlust. I am increasingly seeing that all this sharing and expressing of things that have been buried for so long is definitely a big big key to this healing. Huge in fact. I keep pinching myself when I realise how open I am now, and how much I am sharing. My life is no longer a secret. When a lifetime of pain finally gets a voice and it is safe to be here and for all the feelings to be felt, it is like everything begins to be integrated and healed. Thank you for inspiring. Big love X

  14. Hey there, just found your blog. I look forward to dipping in and out for a little inspiration now and then 🙂

    It’s nice to know ‘you’re not the only one’, and even better to read something that comes with a little ray of hope x

  15. So glad to have found your blog. I like the quick facts list followed by the meat of it — the journey. There comes a time when sharing the journey is more than a whine-fest. It really has become a calling to evoke something more from us– we are a conduit to help others. We of similar vein get it and can still take inspiration from one another. I tend to call the stuff — the pain, fatigue, anguish and its related syndromes the alphabet soup of chronic illness whatever one a person has. Those are seen as the weeds of life, and when we stop whining can become the flowers, the gifts as it were. You sailed through the weeds to see them as what they are the flowers of inspiration and opportunities to heal. rock on!

    • Wow, thank you! What a good comment and metaphor! I am now a firm believer in having a good wine, a good moan, along with a rant and a tantrum every now and then, because there is a lot of health to be found in that. It’s like allowing for those states and feelings, the flowers can blossom more. For so many years I never did any of those things really and all the shit just got stuffed…but now it’s all out! Lots of love, and alphabet soup.

  16. Ah, life. I wonder if there are way more than statistics tell in regards to sexual abuse, assault, and rape and attempts of suicide in the world. Because it seems to me that there are just too many, many, many victims, including ourselves. I praise God for the growing strength and for the sunshine that you share through your posts. Keep going, girlfriend! It takes a lot of faith, but we CAN keep picking ourselves right back up, moving forward, and helping others too along the way. May God bless you in your journey!

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