I’m a writer and cartoonist. I’m a nature addict and a napping enthusiast. I’m a lot of other things too, and this blog is me telling my story, so let’s start with the deets:
Aged 3 my ma and my role, switched. I was titled with the responsibility of saving my her diabetes riddled life, every few days for the coming years.
At 10 this role and relationship was beautifully fucked up.
At 15 the fists at home were being thrown at an all time high.
At 16 ma first started her suicide attempts. These too continued on for the coming years.
At 17 my dabble with anorexia and bulimia began.
At 18 it was in full swing.
At 19 my ma developed psychosis.
At 21 I overate.
At 22 I developed Chronic Fatigue.
At 23 I walked in on my ma attempting to hang herself.
At 23 I was raped.
At 24 I was hit by my boss.
For the summer months of 24 I hit severe depression.
For the winter months I began to develop PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder).
For a couple more of these winter months, I had my first (and LAST) stint of physical self harming.
In the spring of 24 – a year and a half ago – I overdosed.
This event that was intended to bring my life to an end, actually kick started it in more ways than I could imagine. It left me face first in haunting memories, knee deep in grief, and swimming in a pain that is relentless, and seemingly never ending. But the joy, clarity, and sense of connection with myself and the world, that follows these crumbling states, is worth every tear or frown, or yell.
At 26, this blog is my story. It’s my journey of healing and my journey of discovering me. The me beneath, and amongst – and out the other side of – all that crazy shit you read above. It tells tale of my current days, my journey of stepping into my kick ass power, of embracing and releasing my motherfucking anger, of my heartbreak, my inspiration, my food, my grief, my connection with nature and the outside world, and my photographs and cartoons that tell their own stories too.
My life has always danced with total terror and with total beauty. I have been blessed with uncountable incredible experiences, places explored, opportunities offered and adventures galore. Going from someone who used to just tell about the beauty, and joy, I left the darkness and pain stuffed in a box for way too long. Life, for me now, is about sharing it all. My box has already been opened, and as the contents continue to spill to the floor, I want to share them with you all. I hope to reassure others they are not alone, to offer a place for connection, and to inspire. Because whatever shit goes down, out you can come – surviving and thriving. And, it’s a place for me to continue to heal.
Talking and sharing and knowing you are not alone, are – in my eyes – some of the most important things in life, so this is what this blog aims to do. My dream is to share my story with the world and, as I heal, this place feels the best place to start.
All my sunshine.