I wish I could see myself for who I really am

I wish I could feel like I know where I’m at. I wish I could really know that the person I am, is enough. I wish I could really know that who I am becoming is a healthy wholesome being. I wish I could see I’m not becoming my mum. I wish I could see myself for who I really am. I wish I could see that I am thriving and shining and I am only going to continue to. I wish I could see how independent and powerful I am. I wish I could see that I am someone who is going to succeed, and is succeeding already.

I wish I could see myself as I really am.

I wish I could see myself as other people, the loving ones, see me.

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No-one will ever really know

Your story is yours,

It holds your name and no-one else’s.

No-one will ever really hold the key,

To that box within your heart.

To that chest within your soul.

But that’s okay – there’s nothing wrong here,

It is time for you to be the one that turns to yourself.

For years, you have searched, you have scoured,

The corners of the earth,

For someone to understand and hear,

And be there to hold your tear.

They have tip-toed,

Some have come,

But now I see it is for me

To hold that emotional responsibility and protectivity.

Tell your story – share your words, share your life,

But know that at the end of the emotional day,

Only you really knows how it feels,

How it’s been

What has happened,

What it means,

Why?

Because no-one was there living within you but you.

All I long for is someone to really know,

To really understand,

To really be a part of what has been.

But as things rise up to be seen,

I am beginning to learn,

Against my will and want,

That I am the one to take care of me.

The one to set my worries free.

We are all in this together,

There for each other and there to discover,

Arm in arm and heart alongside heart,

But at the end of another emotional day,

We are alone together.

Knowing it is not just you that feels this way,

That even couples that have been together forever and a day,

Hold that loneliness individually to the core.

Alone together does not have to be sad.

It can be empowering,

But at times empty too.

This is when you pick up the phone

And call you.

Whoever that may be,

Know they are there to share that loneliness and to love unconditionally.

No matter how much you feel you don’t have that you, you do.

Just open your eyes and listen to the words of care showered upon you,

And those are the ones you call.

They are the ones that will be there through it all.